International Women's Day

and development, to be exact.


As Kofi Annan said, gender equality is the key to development. All NGOs have a gender angle and most projects on the ground will have women's empowerment as a key aim. This is fabulous, and I've seen it for myself. Women who have been previously silenced, ignored, abused or redundant have been given the opportunities and the tools to be part of bettering their communities and building a better future. They have been given pride, escape and healing and this will have an immeasurable impact on the hopes of future generations.


But the more I see, hear and read about conflict zones; regions that have suffered traumatic events and great loss through violence or natural disasters, I start to wonder about the men... I wonder if working with women is an easier, more natural task? You get them together, bond them as a sisterhood, encourage their communication and help them to deal with feelings. You give them skills they have never had and for the first time they have become someone.


For men who have suffered through war, been victims of regimes and themselves been damaged the solution seems less clear. There are swathes of men who are angry and broken, had their purpose, dignity and pride taken from them. They might come from tribal, patriarchial communities whose women are now rising up. I don't think support groups, counselling sessions and sewing lessons would do much for these men.


Of course, I'm not suggesting that development work is all female-centric. Work with youth and whole communties of both genders goes on and is bringing great transformation. But I worry about the angry men. What do we do for them to be part of breaking the cycles of domestic violence, rape and crime?


Thursdays in Black is staunchly about gender equality, and women's rights form just one part - albeit a very big one. But if we don't stand alongside the hurting men we are only tackling half of the problem.


On a final note, bringing my thoughts back to International Women's Day today, I want to celebrate the men who fight for gender equality. Those who courageously and counter-culturally work to improve the lives of women and challenge communities to move towards equality. I believe that these men are not only incredible, but key in reaching the masses of men who need healing and hope, setting a powerful example and putting their necks on the line!



So here's to the men who stand with the women. And to all who have fought and spoken out for the last 100 years.

International Women's Day

is today, so I've been blogging on http://thursdaysinblack.blogspot.com/

:)

A Note to Men

by Richard McAdam, written for Thursdays in Black and borrowed here because I thought it was quite good.

Gentlemen.

Is for you the word 'feminism' burdened with negative connotations? Does it foster in your manly breast prejudice and resentment, and elicit little more from you than a cocky rolling of the eyes and the arching of an insouciant brow? Does it conjure up images of angry, shrill lesbians daring to express outrage at invisible injustices? Then let me, as one man to another, prescribe the following course of action: through rigorous self-examination, self-education and self-flagellation, you resolve to STOP BEING AN IDIOT, and with the aid of some sort of neuro-linguistic programming adopt a deep and irrefutable notion that the above reactions to the f-word are clear and present symptoms of your BEING AN IDIOT. YOU IDIOT.

What this does not mean: adopting 'feminist' views as a means-to-an-end, paying lip service in order to get some 'lip service' ifyouknowwhatImean. (I mean kissing). It does not mean merely affecting outrage at the objectification or oppression of women when you are not possessed of any true and tangible notion of what that actually means, on any real and visceral level. It does not mean insisting on workplace equality and settling for that as being the only kind of equality that is important. It does NOT mean spouting hollow homilies on the strength and individuality of women or the beauty of the female form whilst at the same time clinging to an idea of them as possessions, convenient accessories for your ego. Don't kid yourself that the men who inflict the horrific physical and emotional violence in the stories from distant lands are some sort of different species, 'monsters' completely alien to your idea of yourself. We might not all necessarily be nurturing the capacity for that sort of cruelty; but that sort of cruelty has been born of these sorts of attitudes.

Why does it not mean these things? Because, ultimately, it's you, as a man, being oppressed; it's you, as a man, suffering the inequality and the prejudice. Not as a result of some numinous notion of human 'togetherness', but because this attitude directly diminishes you. You are a victim of your own discrimination, because what you excise when you decide that you will view women as anything other than equal is a fundamental function of your self. And no, you are not destroying your 'feminine spirit' – you are destroying your 'masculine spirit'. You just need to adjust your idea of what 'masculine' means.

Let me offer you up a contemporary role model: the motion-picture actor Ryan Gosling. Here at Mr. Hugo Schwyzer's blog (a site I'd recommend you delve deep into as part of your self-education), Mr. Schwyzer suggests Mr. Gosling's characterisations as presenting 'a new kind of masculine ideal', because 'he plays flawed and complex men whose tender decency is always at war with his compulsions and his rage,' and not 'overgrown boys'.

The skills needed to fight that war, and to achieve the goals of altering/enhancing/maintain your attitudes toward women are conveniently concomitant with the skills required to be fulfilled and happy. (Or the act of striving to cultivate those skills is in itself fulfillment and happiness, probably, or something.) They are the skills that will, ultimately, make the world a better place. Responsibility, kindness, maturity, and a balance of stoicism and sensitivity. These shall be your goals and your rewards.

Also, girls will like you more, you idiots.

Stories

Right through Advent, Christians are revisiting the Holy Scripture, listening again to the words of the prophets in the Old Testament who foretold of some new initiative God would take, listening again to the humble existence of Mary, listening again to the beautiful story of incarnation- the word of God became flesh in Jesus.

Interestingly, the story of Jesus’ birth is only told largely in one of the gospels, Matthew tells us about the Wise men, but Mark and John don’t mention it at all! If Luke hadn’t recorded it, we may never have known what the first Christmas looked like, who was there. Imagine a world without nativity plays!

The richness and security of our cultures across the world depend so much on storytelling - it’s the miracle of dialogue and understanding.

We have our own stories, I’m sure most of our lives have had twists and turns, surprises, ups and downs. They would undoubtedly involve changes in situation and in ourselves. Ideas and opinions will have altered, aspirations may have developed, certainties possibly challenged. As well as the stories of our selves, there are the important stories we would tell - I wonder, if we were to write a gospel now, what it would it be like.

What good news do we have to share? What would be the message we would want to challenge our readers with? How would we want future generations to remember this period of time and all that is happening within it?

The hope that the gospel I will write will speak of a people of love, a global connected community who stood up to injustice, activist and peace makers, the brave outspoken and quiet healers. I’ll write at length of the church as it awoke called to action, stirred by the insults to the Kingdom they saw all around them. I will put in writing the way that freedom came when normal, ordinary people realised that not only did they have the power to be world changers, they had not choice to do otherwise. That’s good news. And it’s half written in our history already as movements of justice and love gain pace.

Stories are being written all around the world. We have our own gospels to write. What will be in yours?

Imagine

Imagine that your town is being occupied by a military power which then denies you access to your natural resources, taking them and draining them in ways that are irreparably damaging to the environment. They take the water from your land then sell it back to you, even denying it completely sometimes. Imagine living as a second class citizen, you can see the electricity cables stretching from pylon to pylon across the desert but bypassing your village entirely. Imagine that the ways your family have made a living for generations have been taken away, because your land has been taken, and your transportation and movements restricted. Imagine paying taxes on every drop of rain that falls in your water tank –the tank you built because you couldn’t afford to buy water from the authorities. Even that rain, isn’t yours.

This might be a stretch of the imagination. But I’m sorry to say, the reality is even more unbelievable.

In the Jordan Valley I met people so truly poor – that is, with no options or choices left – they pay for transport each day to the settlement of the illegal settlers nearby, the settlement that is taking their water and selling it back to them, taking their ancestral land and doing all they can to drive them out. They then stand in a line up while the man in charge picks who will work that day. They pay this man for his service, if they’re lucky they’ll be picked to work. Imagine. Swallowing all your pride to do that, because you have no choice.

Poverty is not just about economics. It’s being forced to just about survive, to be at the mercy of those who care so little for you, to have no way out.

It seems unbelievable, but I saw it. Realities like these are only challenged when people know. And now you know.

Silent Night

I met some incredible people in Israel and the West Bank, but one person I will never forget is Jonny. He is a Palestinian Christian from Bethlehem and I met him in the foyer of his family’s hotel. He was weeping. He was weeping over the hundreds of olive trees that had been destroyed the day before in a village near Ramallah. The olive trees – the Palestinian pride and joy, livelihood and passion. Ancient, beautiful life giving trees, ripped from the ground. Jonny wept over them, and for the destruction of his precious West Bank that had gone before, and that he knew would continue.

Jonny is 74, and he has skin cancer. His family have saved meticulously to ensure he gets the treatment he needs and can’t get under his insurance as because the hospital in Bethlehem hasn’t the resources, he needs to go to Jerusalem. He has to pay and apply for a permit to pass through the checkpoint to Jerusalem, he doesn’t always get the permit, and when he does, he isn’t always allowed through. When he stays overnight in hospital his family can scarcely afford the permit to visit him, and when they can they cannot guarantee their purchased permission will be accepted.

Early this year in the cold of spring and at the peak of his illness, Jonny travelled once again to hospital. At the checkpoint he was ordered to strip and be searched in the open air in front of the queue and the young soldiers. Jonny has every reason to weep. He is regularly humiliated, his hometown is an open prison and he knows his story won’t make the news.

Jonny has every reason to weep. And so do I. This is my world too. And these things are happening under my nose and in my lifetime and in my chapter of history. A time for action and a time for talking. There is a time to listen and a time to stand for truth. There is a time for shouting, and a time for weeping.

Risky Church

It’s a tricky thing, working with churches sometimes. I work alongside and in partnership with churches and faith groups from across the spectrum of culture and tradition. I love that there are as many things in common as there are differences – people always fill from the back row, there will always be one person in charge of 27 rotas and committees and usually dashing round after the service to catch up with people and rope in a few others. There’s one common element that I find that concerns me though. We don’t like to be too offensive. We as churches often find ourselves catering for the lowest common denominator so that we risk as little as possible. We chose our battles carefully, with a look over our shoulder to make sure we’re not alone and tentatively we tiptoe our way out into the world to gently try and change it.

And yet the history we have, the mandate we have, the example we have in Jesus and his disciples ... the church should be leading the way in standing against injustice, and seeking the Kingdom and being the most relevant institution there is! Yet, try and engage some churches in being a little reckless for the sake of the oppressed, and stick their head out of the bunker on behalf of truth, and tip over the tables of temple in the search for justice... Hmmm! People in our communities are looking for purpose, for a cause which carries a little more weight than who wins X-Factor, for a way to contribute to a better world for our children and grandchildren.

We have dozens of opportunities to do it, to be relevant, to be people who change the world! We did it and ended the legality of the slave trade, we did it and ended apartheid in South Africa. Now we need to once again open our eyes to the harsh realities this world faces and get vocal. Think of the rewards for our world and our church – now let’s take the risks.

Peace

This week I’m sharing some of my thoughts and stories from the Holy Land, the kind of stories you might not usually hear. For example, Hatim.

Hatim had always been aware of things not quite being right. He was outspoken from an early age, challenging those who sought to oppress and rule the proud people of his precious home, Bethlehem. In the early 1990s Hatim spent 8 years in prison for being a member of the Palestinian Liberation Army and for those 8 years he was nothing more than a number. On his release, he chose, for the sake of his children, to work face to face with Israelis, trying to change the situation for both sides. Even as violent conflict broke out again in Israel and the West Bank after the millennium, Hatim was advocating non-violent resistance and dialogue between all parties.

Hatim is a member of Combatants for Peace, an organisation with both Israeli and Palestinian soldiers who have turned away from combat. Those who went to prison or were certified mentally unstable for refusing to be drafted on moral grounds and who now feel they have to share the stories of what they have experienced so that the world will see the other side of the story.

In 2007 Israeli border police opened fire unprovoked on Hatim’s family as they walked past a check point. His 6 year old daughter was shot in the head and killed. In the face of tragedy and grief Hatim chose path he had chosen before. The path of dialogue, and non-violence and standing shoulder to shoulder with the other side. He chose peace. Hatim is one of many who have paid a high price in this conflict and yet, for him, revenge is not an option.

For both Israelis and Palestinians in Combatants for Peace their journey has involved great courage and a massive change of attitude, heart and mind. They have bravely chosen to look beyond what they were told, to see all people as human beings regardless of religion or ethnicity. Keeping the peace is relatively easy, but making peace is much more difficult. In a world of injustice it really is the only choice. And didn’t Jesus say something about the peacemakers being the blessed…?