When I grow up

It's funny how there are occasional themes to a week.

At a Nightchurch meeting last week we shared in an exercise from Brian McClaren's book 'Finding Our Way Again'. The idea is simple, in the context of thinking about your character - fill in this sentence for 1) a day ago 2) a year ago and 3) ten years ago;
'I am more ..... than [time frame] and less .....'

Next, what would you like your character to be in ten years?

Finally, what kind of trajectory are you on, and what can you do to make sure you're on the way to being who you want to be?

I decided I want to be confident in ten years, and to get there I need to not let my insecurities hold me back. This sparked a conversation about what confidence truly is and whether that's what I meant... but that's for another time.

At a work team meeting yesterday we reflected on the stages of life and which characteristics infancy, adolescence and adulthood all have. The final question was 'what do you want to be when you grow up?'

My answer was 'effective, I want to change the world and be effective in what ever part I have to play.'

There was a moment of quiet and I thought back to the theme that had emerged over these seven days. I realised I'd not given the most real answers and a far more honest one kept popping into my head.

When I grow up, I want to be whole.

What's my trajectory to that?! What can I do to help me achieve it!? I'm not sure I even know what it really means... but it seems like a destination worth journeying towards.

I'll keep you posted.