Monday 6th January 2014

No big news today as in solidarity with home, it's been raining most of the day.  It was spitting when I went into town and having finished in the supermarket I assumed there was a downpour because of the crowd huddled outside the doors.  No, it was spitting so I boldly strode through the masses into the square and heard 'creo que ella es europeo' = 'I think she is European'.  I felt very proud.

It may be grey and wet but it's still warm enough in a jumper and I can only sympathise with people back in the South West who are being battered by storms and heavy rain, miserable.  As much as I'm missing Mabel so much, I have noted that I've picked the best time to miss out on dog walking...

As though I'm in tune with the weather, having had a moment of positivity and determination last night, I woke up in a horrible mood and was quite convinced it was best to stay in bed.  I am most certainly my own worst enemy, and waking up feeling so pointless feels like a cheat on my mind's behalf.  I pulled myself out of it, but it reminded me that I'm not immune to my legendary mood swings even here.

I am one of this world's contrary folk. I was convinced I would grow out of it, but no; it's time to embrace my bag of contradictions and extremes and be grateful I'm not beige.  I feel things far more deeply than I'd like to, but if I'm honest I'd rather that than the neutrality of nothingness.  I feel differently about things each day, I work out my theories and thoughts as I go meaning I can disagree with myself from one day to the next.  I'm happy to admit it - I'm hard work.  The challenge is to channel the less helpful phases into something that compliments the package, gives it depth and shades, rather than become the dominant colour.

Here's a photo of a tamal.  Yummy.

Tamal - maize and chicken and potato lots of salt